Fading Black and Blue

puckered, wounded skin now softening

thin curving line cutting front to back

diseased flesh removed

evidence of healing

itching, tugging

signaling wellness

through freshly joined edges of skin

surgeon’s pen now fading

I have more stability now

less aching, more strengthening

body weak, few words with fingers tracing, do I speak

incision, repair job, reconstruction, imperfection 

standing before the mirror,

through paper skin I see

this arm where once was a seed bed of infection

this skin where once was shame

now pink flesh, healing, healthy

painful evidence of life,

the kind of aching and repairing only a body can do

now resonates

cuts acutely accurate,

in the care of skillful hands

resurrecting function in this once disabled limb

able to move again

slowly at first, tight, stretching

I lament, I whine, I surrender

I rise

above the depression of my illness

hand holds, climbing above the darkness like clouds

emergence through the hidden places I’ve created for myself

one who conquered death, tangible

there is no prison I bind myself to

that he has not a key to free me from

this is love,

breathing hope in seeming death

light in darkness

difficult the struggle

stubborn child, fighting the hand of the caregiver

finally releasing clenched fists to receive

at last I have seen

the face of this surrender

and come awake with clean eyes

fresh perspective

I see,

this glorious grace

I earned it not,

yet given reason to hope

and by faith,

surrendered to it